Week 6 Recap - Goodfellas & a Bad Girl

Welcome to the "Goodfellas & a Bad Girl" weekly recap. Contributing Writers: Justin Moreno, Alonzo Beadle, Janelle Caballero & Dana Gretchen.

Contributing Writer: Justin Moreno

​Lloyd Dobler vs Packing Heat
Packing Heat (and Armed Rodgery) took a road trip to Visalia to work at a wedding, but more importantly to experience the wonderful hospitality offered by Lloyd Dobler. After the welcoming party was over, Packing Heat threw a serious beat down on Lloyd.

Lloyd Dobler, on paper, has all the pieces to make a playoff run. But the team has not fired on all cylinders this year, which it could not afford to do in their Week 6 matching against a red-hot Packing Heat squad. Dobler got somewhat predictable scoring from Luck (30), Gurley (35), and Elliot (18). Luck is on a terrible team and is often playing catchup, as was the case against the J-E-T-S. So his 4 TD’s were a welcome sight, but the 3 picks were not. Gurley went off for 208 yards and 2 TD’s as he continues to rip up the league. But Amari Cooper – yuck – posted a big fat goose egg. I thought this guy would have a solid year, so I’m not sure what’s happening up in Oakland (intentional tanking?). In any case, Dobler, the amazing host, put up a respectable 117 points, and still got decimated.

Packing Heat actually had the game won before the Sunday night matchup between the Chiefs and Patriots, featuring the #1 QB in the league (Mahomes). Mahomie dropped a cool 38 points, despite losing to the Patriots. By the time the Sunday night game started, Lloyd was drinking beer and asking when Packing Heat (and Armed Rodgery) would be headed home. Never before has an amazing host felt so humiliated in the history of mankind. In all seriousness, Packing Heat tore up Week 6. Melvin Gordon (33), Julio Jones (24), Thielen (29) – wish I would have drafted him!, Ebron (10), and Allen (10). After the bludgeoning of the host was over, Packing Heat had a cool 161 points on the board, and that’s with Tyreek Hill (40 points) sitting on the bench. Packing Heat is stacked and looks poised to destroy other challengers.

Moral of the story: Don’t host her, unless you can hack her account and bench a few players.
L: Lloyd Dobler (117 pts)  Record: 3-3
W: Packing Heat (161 pts) Record: 3-3
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Contributing Writer: Alonzo Beadle

Worthy of My Greatness vs. Mr Cha -Ching
The Worthy ones trotted onto the field led by The Core Four.
James "Bond" Conner, Davante "Love Me" Adams, Antonio "Down Town" Brown and Ooooh those "Golden" Jimmy Grahams who busted out a solid 99pts. The crew put 138 points worth of beat down on the Cha -Ching. Mr -Ching's all time fav captain Cam The Big Fig Newton put up 27 points while 5 of his mates cashed out with only 10 points total. It was a sad day as Mr. continued his now 3 game loser streak. Would next week by his fourth?!  :O Victory WMG!
L: Mr. Cha-Ching (79 pts) Record: 3-3
W: Worthy of My Greatness (138 pts) Record: 4-2

Ertz when Efiert vs Truffle Shuffle
So far  the Ertz seems to be dominating the league but would he continue his master against the Truffle?

It wouldn't take long as each Ert, fierted double digits while Matt Von Ryan's Express powered down the tracks for 33pts.  There was a lil Tuffle with the Shuffle as the Truffle's lined up for their routine. Imagine the confusion when one of the Ertz members quietly played the record from LMFAO's Sexy and I know it? Everyone was shocked as they shuffled to "Wiggle, Wiggle, Wiggle, Wiggle, Wiggle, yeah".  :O Victory Ertz!
L: Truffle Shuffle (89 pts) Record: 2-4
W: Ertz when Eifert (150 pts) Record: 5-1
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Contributing Writer: Janelle Caballero

Bye Week vs. Bye Week… um, I mean Wookies
Three years removed from a Fantasy Championship and one year from being the top-seeded team heading into the playoffs last season, the Wookies are looking like they are in a ‘rebuilding year’. Heading into week 6, they had a 1-5 record, quite possibly their worst start in franchise history. After week 6, they now have 614 total points scored, which puts them 275 points behind the highest scoring team, Ertz when Eifert. It’s not hard to figure out why they haven’t been scoring many points each week, with only 1 player ranked in the top 10 of their position who’s not injured. Their TE, Kittle, gets that title, who the Wookies payed $26 off the waiver wire for. Their other top 10 player, Cooper Kupp (ranked 9 at WR), is now injured and will be out at least through week 7.
Now let’s look at BYE Weeks, stats. Heading into week 6, they had a 2-3 record. Definitely not terrible, but could use some vast improvement. Through week 7 they’ve scored, 577 points, which puts them 312 points behind Ertz. However, in recent weeks their player rankings have gotten better, and they have 5 players ranked in the top 10 of their position. Given these stats, the real BYE Week team, had an actual shot at beating the Wookies.
Playing QB for BYE Week was the red hot, Goff, coming off a 52-point affair in week 4, but was held to only 7 points against a strong Denver defense. The Wookies QB, Watson who has had a relatively slow start this season, also finished with a measly 7 points. Good thing these two teams didn’t tie on team points, or their QBs would’ve lost them the game.  Needless to say, this was a pretty ho-hum game with most of the Wookies action coming from their benched players (86 points on the bench?!?). BYE Week had a few bright spots on the team: WR Alshon Jeffery (24 points), WR Taylor Gabriel (17 points) and their kicker Butker (18 points). In the end, BYE week kicked Wookies Butker right where it counts.
L: Wookies (51 pts)  Record: 1-5
W: Bye Week (83 pts) Record: 3-3

Armed Rodgery vs Chief Deflators
Armed Rodgery? Honestly this team should be named, Armed Barkley. The #2 ranked RB, Saquon Barkley has scored 145 points for the Armed clan. That’s pretty great for a guy who’s playing on one of the worst offenses in the league (NY Giants). Heading into this matchup these two teams seemed pretty evenly matched, but a strong showing from Armed Rodgers (33), Sheriff Barkley (36), Outlaw Boyd (23) and Texas Ranger Hooper (18) put the Armed Brigade ahead of the Deflators by 68 points.  A big fat goose egg by Alfred Morris, left the Deflators, well… a little deflated. Let’s see if their team can bounce back in week 7.
L: Deflators (73 pts) Record: 3-3
W: Armed Rodgery (141 pts) Record 3-3
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Contributing Writer: Dana Gretchen
Straight Outta Goffton vs Ram I Ain't
154 vs 49

Well another week in the books and another chance for Viju to smell that sweet toilet paper on his favorite trophy. Its been a crazy season to this point, but who cares because rams are the best team in football! Oh its hurt for so long, I was starting to even miss the Sam Bradford and Stephen Jackson days, and those really sucked, but its all good now. So Viju... take 49 points and jump for joy!
L: Ram I Am (49 pts) Record 3-3
W: Straight Outta Goffton (154 pts) Record 4-2

THE END